Twas the night before Game Seven, when all through Home Ice
Not an announcer was stirring, or offering advice
The microphones were hung in the studio with care
In hopes that Eric Gage would take to the air.

The listeners were nestled all sung in their beds
While visions of Cup celebrations danced in their heads
And Blakeley in his news booth, preparing his cast
Looking up all the stories and stats from the past.

When up in CR2 there arose such a clatter
Pogi had called to indulge in some chatter
The lines were all jammed with callers galore
Each one proclaiming the game’s final score.

The fans of the Red Wings convinced they’ve been wronged
Let down by the league and the refs for a song
The fans of the Penguins were sure it was they
Who were being shafted at the end of the day.

What’s up with this Sidney the Wings fans cry out
Why he’s no more than a wee wittle lout
Pens fans reply it’s not us that do cheat
Your boards are quite bouncy, to aid your repeat.

And your eight-legged friends that you toss with delight
Were funny back when Jack Benny ruled the night
Your goalie is holey your Mule quite the fool
It’s you who tomorrow will be taken to school.

Not so, cried the denizens of Hockeytown
For what is a Penguin but a tuxedoed clown
A bird that can’t fly, like a song that can’t sing
Thus it will be us with the Stanley Cup ring.

Enough, cried out Trigger as he hung up the phones
There’s too much noise and I vant to be alone
Time for a replay or NHL Live
Let’s hear how the Ranger fan somehow survives.

Then Rossy and Espo butted heads on the air
Arguing loudly over what calls were fair
Shalley and Berce compared notes from afar
Though honestly they’d rather be at a bar.

Thistel just whistled as Boomer complained
About this thing and that thing again and again
Scotty was off watching Junior be born
For his Habs all these weeks later Mick still did mourn.

The Voice of The War Room prepared to exclaim
The Red Wings have won the Cup once again
But just to be safe, he also did say
The Penguins went north and stole the Cup away.

On Malkin on Crosby on Jordan, that Staal
On Fleury on Guerin on Bile-el-sa-maa
On Datsyuk on Osgood on Zetter, the Berg
On Holmstrom on Lidstrom to down flightless bird.

Whether Versus or cable or the NBC
Millions of Yankees may not even see
Their TV sets blank with the digital switch
On the night of the big game, ain’t life a bitch?

And up here in Cold Land, aka Balsillie ville
Make It Seven, heck, Make it 500 Mill
The only way Canada can win back the Cup
Is if Jimbo buys all the teams up.

Game Seven is still just a day’s wait away
Soon the puck will drop and the match they will play
But I heard Thistel exclaim as he left with Jeff Leake
Training camps open in just over twelve weeks.

After missing about a week of hockey, thanks to the Great Basement Flood of Oh-Nine, I was finally able to plug back in the HDTV widescreen on Monday evening, and get back into the Coolest Game on Ice, or is that The Fastest Game On Earth, or whatever we’re calling it these days.

Started with the Dallas Stars tangling with the feisty Columbus Blue Jackets.  Those dudes from Ohio, that well-known Western state, apparently are genuine in their efforts to make the NHL post-season for the first time in their relatively short history.

The hometown Blue Jackets poured shot-after-shot at Marty Turco, but the trouble was, this was vintage Marty Turco in net, not the imposter from earlier this season.  Turco made some fantastic saves, and the Stars emerged with the 3-2 win in the shootout, though Brad Richards left the game in the second period with what appeared to be a wrist injury.

Next flipped over to the suddenly firewagon Atlanta Thrashers in L.A. to take on the Kings.  Atlanta are too far out in the East to seriously make a run for a playoff spot, but you never know, particularly with the way Ilya Kovalchuk has been finding the back-of-the-net lately.  The Kings, however, are in a race for the bottom end of the Western Conference post-season invites, and every game will be huge here on in.

Well, it didn’t start that way for the Kings.  The Thrashers pumped three goals quickly past Jonathan Quick, building up a 3-0 lead only 7 1/2 minutes into the game.  Quick found the end of the bench, and Erik Ersberg took over between-the-pipes.

I was tempted to abandon this matchup, and turn my attention to the Oilers and Coyotes; in fact, I quickly checked that game out, before returning my attention to Southern California.

Maybe the Hockey Gods whispered in my ear, but it turned out to be a wise choice.  The Kings finally got on the board, only to see Atlanta answer back 33 seconds later.  L.A. got one more before the end of the first.

After 20 minutes, this game already had six goals, a fight, a goaltending change, a big lead by the road team, the start of a comeback by the home team, and all that with at least 40 minutes to play.

The Kings would outshoot the Thrashers 45-27 in the game, but more pointedly, L.A. outshot the visitors 34-13 in the second and third period combined.

Ersberg made a number of great saves, while Hedberg held his own when he was called upon.  There were nice goals, shorthanded goals, powerplay goals, video replays, and playoff-type tension as the third period wound down.

The Kings fought back from a 6-3 deficit and tied things up with a powerplay marker, and the goaltender yanked, with only five seconds remaining, on a nice goal by Anze Kopitar, who was able to corral a rebound, and had the presence-of-mind, and a boatload of talent, to step back and set himself properly before burying the puck.

I didn’t have a rooting interest in this game, so what I wanted to see was an entertaining hockey game, and both the Thrashers and the Kings delivered that on Monday evening.  Eventually, Atlanta would win 7-6 in the shootout, denying the Kings that vital second point.

Kings’ fans experienced a bittersweet evening of hockey.  They were five seconds away from losing, but at this stage in the season, they really needed that second point as well.

After three-and-a-half seasons, I’m still not totally sold on deciding regular-season games by the shootout, but I recognize the drama that comes with it, and on Monday night, it seemed only fitting that a game such as this would be decided in this manner.   Last man standing.

And the fans were standing.

Sure, three periods of high-tempo overtime would have been preferable, but we know that’s only going to occur during the playoffs. 

The Thrashers-Kings game had a bit of everything, but mostly, it was fun to watch.  Credit to the Thrashers for not sitting back when they had the three-goal lead.  It almost cost them that second point, but they won my respect.  Head coach John Anderson and his troops made the game enjoyable to watch, and even though you’ll often hear that tired old “just win, baby” saying that I believe came from the mouth of Al Davis, more importantly, the Thrashers went instead with “let us entertain you”.

After all, sports is entertainment, and if it ain’t entertaining, people will find something else to do with their money, particuarly in these times.

Encore, encore!

- Mick Kern